Daily Drama 35 (by Dobby)

blah blah blah

^ See that? I’m leaving it there. Stacy wants me to write this Daily Drama for her because “she is too busy” but she told me I have to use this template, and I think it is kind of insulting the way she set it up. She also said I had to write about the wild mallard drake getting stuck in the aviary. What a LOSER! He tried to fly out, instead of walking out the gate, which is how he got in, of course. And I’m not allowed to mention my harness malfunction this afternoon.

She’s got a lot of nerve.

So, she abandoned me for about a week, and left me with the pet-sitter. I tried to get rid of him, but he is extraordinarily persistent and annoying. He doesn’t let me into the kitchen, he doesn’t straighten my blankets every day, and there is no Garden Party with the chickens and ducks in the afternoon. It’s a miserable existence.

My eyelashes went white! Just kidding. That’s a feather.

The first day she was home, I spent almost all day in the kitchen, snoozing, lolling about, and generally reclaiming my territory.

It’s all mine, and I’ll do what I want with it.

I must say she brought home some nice weather, but it only lasted a couple days.

Pouffy in the sunshine.

Now that she’s home, I can go to the front yard to graze, again. Here is a picture of me in the front yard:

WAIT A MINUTE! I WASN’T READY!

She is relentless with the camera, which is why I am stuck writing this blog: she took so may pictures of that island she went to that it is going to be a couple blogs, or maybe one great big boring one. There were NO CAPYBARAS AT ALL.

This is more like it!

I actually lost five pounds while she was gone. I had more than enough to eat, I just wasn’t very hungry. I got a little dehydrated, too, even though I had hot tubs all the time, and an entire swimming pool full of water to drink. Lula the chicken has improved, though, and even left the infirmary a couple times, but she’s still a little bit weak. Everybody else is about the same.

A bit thin, a bit dehydrated.

Now that I can migrate to the front yard again, I am an eating machine. I had some good bamboo while she was gone, but there’s nothing quite as satisfying as grazing in your own front yard.

I’m a lawnmower.

That’s all for now, folks.

It is a funny farm.